Category: other

Footballer gets sent off for passing wind during game. a google translate story.

So the BBC Website has the following story.Screen Shot 2016-06-23 at 09.09.52

“A Swedish footballer was sent off for passing wind during a match – with the referee dismissing him for “deliberate provocation” and “unsportsmanlike behaviour”. (Sport Bladet)

I clicked the link to Sport Bladet – it is a newspaper in Swedish. I so not speak the Swedish so I looked at the picture and decided the referee was correct to send off this player.


Screen Shot 2016-06-23 at 09.10.06

I then copied the text of the article into google translate. An internet tool well known for its hermeneutic skills. What proceeded from Google was I believe a word for word translation of the article. (note to self, Swedish newspapers may not prove a long term reading source.)

Adam Lindin Ljungkvist offered lead after smoking.

It ended with a red card.
– I was bad in the stomach and in the last minute I put a fart. Then the judge came and gave me a yellow card, then a red, said left-back.
The strange expulsion occurred in Division 7 match between Järna SK’s reserve team and Pershagen SK, which Länstidningen Södertälje was the first to draw attention.
In the final stage was Pershagen SK’s Adam Lindin Ljungkvist, 25, sent off after receiving receiving his second yellow card. Adam Lindin Ljungkvist, playing left back, saw the red card due to a fart.
“It was heard properly”
– It was a strange penalty, I can hardly believe it myself. I was bad in the stomach and in the last minute I put a fart. Then the judge came and gave me a yellow card, then a red card. It was my second warning and I had no track of my first at all. I had no memory at all. Then I was a little angry at the judge, I could not quite believe what had happened. All around stood asgarvade says Lindin Ljungkvist.
– That I can suspect is that he thinks I did it against an opponent. But to provoke anyone with a fart is not particularly smart or normal. No, but I added just a fart and I got the red card. The judge said it was unsportsmanlike behavior.
It must have been a fabulous …?
– Haha. Yes, it must have been. I saw that they had asked one of Järnas law and he said it was heard properly. Sometimes one can not see whether there is the small or large. It is believed that the little comes out, but it still allows.
You broke up with the judge afterwards?
– No. I asked him in a bad way, but there was no bad words. I was annoyed, while I could not believe I was sent off.
Was it a fisförnämt verdict?
– I think it was a crappy judgment. Now I just laugh about it. There is no one else who has heard of this before, I’ve never heard of anyone who has been sent off to be farting.
“Said something about that I was a spray launcher”
No, exactly. But what is the spontaneous gut feeling in the situation?
– My spontaneous feeling: “huh, are you kidding me?”. Then I questioned him before I went away.
You cleared the air?
– He said something about me being a spray-makers. There was no such thing. It was not that I stood there for several minutes. I said he was a “buffoon” and then I went to plan …
… It was just to let it go.
– Exactly. Yes, it was the last thing that happened. It was in 93 minutes.
Have you got any shit for this?
– For fart? No, haha. People have laughed at that. Nothing negative. I do not care that much either. It’s natural to add a fart and then.
How do you see the rest of the season for myself – it’s just that the gas on?
– Yes, ha ha. Just to drive on. We lost 2-5. But it will probably be better the rest of the season.
You are a player with a lot of speed and excitement …?
– Yes it’s me.
But you have to hold tight back …
– Yes. And thunder down the cross in from, haha.
Pershagen SK lost the match by 2-5.

My #secret is out, I am a ballet dancing, high heel wearing, 40-50 year old woman.

Screen Shot 2014-09-23 at 10.51.39
My brother recently become British champion of Decathlon form men aged 40-45. Well done. I have been trying to match my brother, by getting fitter. I doubt I will be running 100m in under 12.54 seconds anytime soon. Before the summer I was running around 9k, slowly but running, and my times for a 22k road cycle route near my house were edging down towards the hour mark.

In July at Solas Festival I hurt my right foot. The week afterwards the foot was sore to walk on. Over the summer the pain has gone mostly, but if I try to cycle or even worse run it gets very sore. For the day or two afterwards I am in pain when I walk. I went to the doctors, described my symptoms. He knew exactly what it was; Mortons Neuroma.

265 (1)
So the nerve between the bones of the foot is annoyed when I exercise. I can honestly say my body doesn’t like when I exercise. aAccording to this website. (because everything on the internet is true),

It is a condition that affects one of the common plantar digital nerves that run between the long bones (metatarsals) in the foot. It most commonly affects the nerve between the third and fourth metatarsal bones, causing pain and numbness in the third and fourth toes.

That sounds like what I experience. So far so accurate. It’s under the section of who typically gets Mortons Neuroma that the website adopts a revelationary role.

About three people out of four who have Morton’s neuroma are women. It commonly affects people between the ages of 40 and 50 but can occur at any age.

Poorly fitting or constricting shoes can contribute to Morton’s neuroma.It is more common in women who habitually wear high-heeled shoes or in men who are required to wear tight (constrictive) footwear. It may also be more common in ballet dancers.

So at last I can confess.
I am a 40-50 year old woman, who habitually wears high-heeled shoes (today is a lovely set from Chloe), while doing my ballet dancing. That is certainly something I thought I lacked the repertoire to achieve, but you know its certainly a look that I can carry off, at least 3 times out of 4 i can.

Anyway, I am due to see the specialist soon to see what I can do about it, if you see me wearing special shoes soon you know whats happened right?

the best albums of 2011 – top 3

so the top 3 albums i heard this year were


life Fantastic – Man Man –
‘Catchy songs with an off kilter edge musically’




Ask Me This – Alcoholic Faith Mission –
‘gorgous music, with a fragility and power to it’




Circuital – My Morning Jacket –
‘great album, rock music as it should be’




Categories: advent 2011 music other


I just don’t get this linkage, or this attitude which esteems success as the thing to be copied. Inspired by reading about abraham, jacob, moses, I have been thinking a lot about failure. Recently I was at on a course. The first session leader told us about failure being useful and being key to learning, how failure is valuable and worthwhile to seeing how things can be done better. In short how to change and learn. Yet to fail or to be perceived as a failure is very negative.

In fact failure is to be avoided and thrown away as worthless. In the second session of the course I was on, (a different leader,) every example used, esteemed and praised was one of external success. I wonder if you get more press coverage if you are a celebrity who has a high profile success of if you have a high profile failure. I think you get more for failure, but that just reinforces the position of failure being bad.

I just don’t know where this leaves us.
I fail
I struggle with feeling that those failures are negative.
sometimes they are, sometimes, though.

I think my life is/can/will be positive. I think I have changed and learned and grown through those failures. I also choose to think any success I am perceived to have is down to those failures. (Unlike mr Jordan in the advert above not sure I have had the same level of career he has had!)

I think the concept of confession has a lot going for it in terms of disabling this failure is bad position. where grace, love and forgiveness are present and available for all. Where failures like myself can be rested and cared for.

Within the act of confession is rest renewing, a casting off of that you are carrying. The verbalisation of a failure has a big effect on the spirit. Perhaps thats why so many public speakers start off with a story which could be perceived as a confession. (A joke which self denigrates.)

Wonder what an ethic of failure would look like.
I wonder what a theology of failure could work up as…

Advent 4 – Happiness, a song

Currently I am thinking about happiness.
I think it is a key conceptaround living and how society icurrently organisess itself. (more on that tomorrow!)
So are an intro some interesting lyrics about happiness from Ron Sexsmith’s retriever album.

“Happiness so hard to come by
So good while it lasts
Some people say
That it ain’t worth pursuing
Cos’ it’s always moving too fast

Still I wonder
What could it be
And I wonder
What does it mean
Cos’ I’m so in love with you
If this ain’t happiness baby it’ll do
Let’s call it happiness

Happiness so hard to deal with
When there is sadness in your eyes
As you come through the door
It may leap out of the darkness
It’s always yelling “Surprise!”

So I wonder
What does it mean
And I wonder
Why me
Cos I’m so in love with you
If this ain’t happiness baby it’ll do
Let’s call it happiness

Oh there’s no denying
It’s one of those things
That money can’t buy
But still we try

May we all mop up
And our cup runneth over
May we all have
More than enough of

Cos I’m so in love with you
If this ain’t happiness baby it’ll do
Let’s call it happiness

Happiness, by ron sexsmith.

advent 2 – A Story

Today was a snow day (no School or nursery) and I had fun with the children.

We played at home and went to the Lanark Loch to feed the swans.
The snow was deep and crunched under our feet.
The Loch was quite busy for a Thursday in December.
We took bread and decided to feed the ducks and the swans.

There was a broken piece of ice where the duck and swans were.
We parked and my son got out the car.
I handed him two bread bags with a couple of slice in each.
As I put together the push chair for the the girl.

“Look at the swan.”
I looked up as I put together the extremely well designed dutch pram.
A swan had wandered up the car and was marking his territory around our car.
I put the children around the other side of the car.
A second swan came round in a flanking manouvre.

Buy the time the girl was in the chair we had four swans chasing us across the car park.
I asked the boy for the bags of bread and put them in my jacket.
With the disappearance of the branded bags the swans backed off and lost interest in us.

We wandered the edge of the loch we saw swans dominating the space and walking around on the pathway.
We stopped about 10 meters away and started to throw some of the bread.
The swans took their time getting to us, but the ducks quickly realised and came in numbers.
Every time a swan got to close on land we walked on 20-30metres.

Until after 3-4stops we got rid of the branded bags.
the ducks wandered off and swans decided to stop following us after a while.

We wandered in the snow, free from the chains of swan consumerism.
Enjoying a snow day.